Flight to Pakistan 1/2: Hello Mr. Minister

The desi boarding queue
It was time for boarding atlast. As soon as the attendant came to open teh gates.. people started to ramp up on teh gate. Gone was the trend of making queues (or atleast the straight ones). Even though we were still in a foreign country, yet as everyone now left on this airport gate were Pakis.. so the same old struggle of getting inside first started. The atteneded did try to hold the swarm and organize by telling only seat holders 50~60 to go in first.. yet everyone kept storming inside; as if they boarded earlier than the other guy.. then they would reach home early than him. Dont u just love paki mentallity… i missed this for so long in Japanese queues. I was finally back in my own ppl

Is this what I have been missing for past 3 months?
once i was seated.. i ran my eyes around to see what kind of neighbours i got this time. it was a window seat.. so i looked to left, currently no one has claim the seat beside me.. but right beyond seat I saw… what i call “The Reality”. and a vast difference struck to me… of what I used to see when going to Narita Airport… and now what I was seeing enroute to Pakistan. is this wht I had been missing for past 3 months??

Enroute to Narita Airport

Enroute to Lahore Airport

My neighbour: Mr. Minister
Finally my very next neighbour came. A skinny black colored guy with a totally unimpressive personality. Later on in the story I would find out that he was from Punjab governments ministry of Agriculture. He had a companion with him who sat on th eseat behind me.. whom I called his “Cham cha”. I think he was his P.A. but Cham Cha describes his job more appropriately. Now let me point out some intersting things which happened with this guy, as he was the one who made this trip a Disney ride for me as well as a frustating hell:

• First of all when he came he had lots of hand carried oversized bags all of which he put in front of his seat and sat down with legs outside and blocking the passenger way. Cham-cha told him that you can put the luggage in overhead compartment. so he got up and started to pull the compartment from body instead of pressing the handle. the cham-cha got up and opened it with handle.. 1 item placed. then minister ji tried to open second one again without handle and it wont open… after which he said.. “This one must be locked and looks full too .. open that one”. And Cham-cha didnt say anything as he didnt wanna emabarass his boss infront of all. and opened the other compartment.. and placed some luggage there too. and after that the rest of bag the misnister said he would just place in between his leg.. and so he did for all the rest of trip.
• The first question he asked me after sitting was “Kidher Kidher sey ho ker jaye ga yeh plane?”. I told him it will go straight to Lahore. And he got happy and confirmed.. “really? chola acha hai non-stop wala plane mila hai”. and i was looking at him in wonder. and then came his second linked question. “So, all of these people are going to lahore too?”, and i said “yes ofcourse”. And he asked, “koi bhi karachi ka nehin?”. and i was getting tempremental now and said “no they have to visit some relatives in lahore and then they will go by road to karachi”. and the minister noded in agreement and went quiet.
• When plane started to take a run on the runway… the minister grab hold of teh front seat with both his hands.. as he was going to fall down. and all the rest of time till the flight wasnt in air.. he clutched the front seat like his life dependended on it
• Later when the plane started to climb altitude.. the started waving hand and started to yell “Hello!”.. “Waiter”.. and i stopped him and asked him the matter and he said.. he wanted water. So, i told him that you have wait until plane is back in straight position, right now all the air hostesses are also sitting with belt buckled. no one is allowed to walk right now and they will serve water first thing once plane is on smooth ride.
• When we boarded he asked at what time we would reach Lahore. And I told him that 11:00 PM as per Pakistan time. ok tht was no problem… but after 1 hour he asked me again, and I told him that 11:00 PM and he said to me in frustration… “Yeh kia bakwas hai.. ghenta do, ho giya urtay hoa… ab bhi 11:00 bajay hi pohancay ga”. and I was speechless..
• Later I told him the button to call the air hostess and not to yell. The guy was not just a “simple” pendu but a sharif pendu too. He was unable to talk to female air hostesses and only talked infront of male ones (but in urdu, without even realizign that all of them are Thai and dont understand urdu). which also made me realize that he may be an elected candidate back from a trip to china and yet he doesnt know a few words of english.
• When the dinner was served.. the Air hostess came to ask the kind of food we would like to eat either lamb or chicken. I told her chicken. then she looked at minister to take his answer. He was too afraid and tense to even look at her. so she repeated her question, “Would you like lamb…”, the minister nodded, “… or chicken?”, the minister nodded again. The air hostess got confused. she asked the same thing.. and the minister did the same thing.. he nodded on both the things. so she desperately looked at me now.. and i just told her.. “Bring him chicken!”. so she took a sigh of relief and gave him chicken too.
• After dinner when tea and coffee was served.. thankfully a male attended was handling tea pot. Mr minister were waiting desperately for tea. But when he came.. minister said nothing, so i asked him .. “Didnt u want tea?” and he said yes and raised his cup. So, attendant poured hot kawa inside. and minister started to yell:
  “Adha cup dalo.. adha cup.. adha cup”. the attendant got scared, and I said to attendant.. “Half cup please”. so he filled half cup and then when he was about to leave he asked for milk. I told him that he was already given milk powder in the packet in his dinner tray. so he poured the powder and then yelled again for sugar.. the attended turned back and asked if he wanted MORE sugar? and i showed Minister that sugar packet was right beside his powder packet. the minister poured the sugar picket inside and murmered… “Jo cheeni us kay pass thi woh ziada achi thi”. and i didnt reply as it was futile as it was the same Thai airways sugar packet which the attendant have .. the same which was already in his tray.

So, u get the idea of how my journey went.. i have to cut short his stories as this would go on an on. Not to mention that I had to put in my ear phones *even though I wasnt playing anything on it.. just to make him think tht i am busy and not listening to him. Then he took a pill and went to sleep.. and I thanked God, and finally i had peace of reading my book… which just keeps getting better and better.. I am really enjoying a good book after so long time.